just come out here and I will go home with you...
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
