he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Randomize
