Sponge bath it is.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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