i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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