just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
