I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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