He is such a slut. More and more my type.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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