therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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