No, drunk sperm still make babies.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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