Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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