Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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