So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
