I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
wow bdsm is so cute
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
