Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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