i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
