i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
