i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
