I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
just tell him i said nine months
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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