discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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