I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
