So drunk its hurt
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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