she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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