you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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