I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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