your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
