i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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