Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize