Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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