So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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