porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
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