the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
