Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So drunk its hurt
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
