I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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