I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
im holly from the hills drunk
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
we're so committed to being not committed
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
