Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
