everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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