the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
