I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
