haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
