So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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