Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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