: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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