She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
