I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
