And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
