He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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