Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
