the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
