Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
