Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
