i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
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